[friends-locked]

[tastes_of_honey]

Things have been weird lately. Or I've been weirder than usual.

Things with the Aya of my reality have actually gotten kind of dull. Time and sexy time with him were a lot more fun when he thought he hated me or hated to like me. Now that he just feels grateful to me and thinks I'm sexy everything's gotten boring. He's not even very creative with me, and he takes me for granted. It doesn't help that his Ken-ken has given him permission to do whatever with me, because even the thrill of forbidden fruit sex is gone. I may have to put him off the next few times he swings by to see if that spices it up a bit.

But this post isn't really about him.

Things with Red have settled down a bit. We're now compromising for each other about as much as you'd expect two psychos could, so some problems have been resolved. The underlying issues remain.

But this post isn't really about him either. You could say that I'm using all of it for setup.

Nagi had to refuse Thanksgiving this year because he had a client he couldn't schedule for anything other time, very pointedly telling Brad that the Japanese don't give a shit about Thanksgiving, duh. That made it a dinner for just me and Brad. He made some of the dishes and bought others, while I came over with a pumpkin pie I made from picking the mind of my building's resident baking mistress. But I barely remember the food because the whole time I could feel Brad's anticipation rising as if he were stroking my skin with soft fur. Although I couldn't get into his weirdly structured mind enough to read why he felt that way, I started feeling a sense of anticipation as I wondered when I'd see what he was anticipating. By the time we got to dessert he started adding lust to the anticipation, not that I needed to feel that too because I was already hard. I managed to finish my slice of pie with whipped cream and my cup of coffee before I tackled him about half a minute before he would've tackled me. Though with him being a precog maybe he'd deliberately timed it to let me make the first move.

Whatever, we went at it for hours and it was incredible. I don't mean that he did anything really different, and I've been having sex with the man for over half my life. I mean that he was intense and focused on me in a way he rarely is. He really, really wanted me and made sure I felt it. He was still like that when I woke up in the morning with him.

But that wasn't what the anticipation was about, so he also still had that going the whole time. The anticipation was about him saying he wanted me to move into an apartment with him again. We'd pick a new place together as a fresh start and would each have our own bedroom like we used to since I can't spend too long in the middle of his boring order and he starts getting antsy amidst my clutter. I made some nervous jokes about the two of us eating meals together and taking our old psychics' vitamins and minerals with them but finally ended it by saying I needed time to think about it. Calm and confident, he accepted that answer, damn him. He knows that doing it that way makes me wonder if he foresaw something to make him that confident.

I'm still thinking about it because I'm tempted. Yeah, he pulled a few really major shitty things in the last few years but nothing like that recently. I'd say that I've shown him conclusively that I can say no to him and that I'm not dependent on him. I got him to admit that he wants and needs me. I miss having him around too.

And I need a change.

But I'm still having misgivings, like wondering whether sharing an apartment with him again would be a regression.

Comments

[killwithmymind.livejournal.com]

Nagi grins. "How does he feel about you having Aya over as a fuck buddy?"

[tastes-of-honey.livejournal.com]

Gave me a funny look when I mentioned it but didn't seem too put out over the idea. I think he still has some idea of me seducing Aya into developing his talent and joining Schwarz. ::tosses hair:: I make gorgeous bait.

[killwithmymind.livejournal.com]

"Maybe he's hoping to get in on a hot threesome." Nagi doesn't think that Aya would go for Crawford, but who knows? Maybe those wacky fanfic writers are right.

"Do you want to live with Crawford again?"

[tastes-of-honey.livejournal.com]

I don't think it'll happen, but I've seen stranger stuff.

I don't know. I do, and I don't. I don't entirely trust him not to revert back to taking me for granted and pulling stupid shit. But we belong to each other too. It's stupid.

[killwithmymind.livejournal.com]

Nagi also thinks that Schu and Crawford belong together in a lot of ways, and he thinks that the seperation was part of why Schu was unhappy-lonely so often. But Crawford needs to not be a dickhead.

"Hmm.... three month test run? Tell him you'll try it, but you're keeping your own flat until you're sure he's sincere."

[tastes-of-honey.livejournal.com]

::Too true.::

Maybe. ::smirk:: Though what if he's good for three months then gets skanky after I get rid of my apartment? ::more seriously:: Maybe this is my answer, that I don't trust him.

[killwithmymind.livejournal.com]

Nagi shrugs. "No, you don't trust him, but you want him to prove that you can, right? Don't tell him it's three months. Or don't make it three months. Hell, get Red to flip a coin for you every month or so if you want to keep Crawford guessing."

[tastes-of-honey.livejournal.com]

Right. That's a better idea.

::brightens:: And not finding me there a lot would certain stop Aya from taking me for granted.

[killwithmymind.livejournal.com]

"Do you think walking in on us would also stop Aya from taking you for granted? Because I'm totally willing to have sex with you if it will help you out there." Awww, isn't Nagi so generous?

[tastes-of-honey.livejournal.com]

::smirk:: I don't think it would have that effect. At this point it wouldn't even surprise him.

[killwithmymind.livejournal.com]

"Would it have a threesome effect? I could work with that, too. No. Wait. That doesn't solve your problem. But it will make you feel better. Umm... I could bring over my Schuldig and we could have a hot threesome, and walking in on that would totally break Aya's brain." ...someone has been reviewing too many porn scripts lately.

[tastes-of-honey.livejournal.com]

Might make him run screaming from the room too. Intellectually he understands the idea of alternates, but I believe that being presented with sexy proof in the doubled flesh would break his brain for a bit.

Besides, your Schu and I didn't exactly get along. I think yours felt threatened by me, poor thing. ::preen::

[killwithmymind.livejournal.com]

"I kinda get along with you way better than I do with him. Or I did then. And was flaunting that." Nagi had really had a spectactular pissyfest at his own team once he was reassured that they were going to live.

[tastes-of-honey.livejournal.com]

That's because I'm awesome and he's not. ::Schu has yet to meet another Schuldig who's even his equal.::

::And Nagi was completely justified in doing so!::

[killwithmymind.livejournal.com]

Nagi rolls his eyes fondly. "You also had the advantage then of not having recently been mostly dead."

[tastes-of-honey.livejournal.com]

Being mostly dead has never stopped me from being fierce and sassy.

[killwithmymind.livejournal.com]

Nagi raises an eyebrow. "Is fierce and sassy the new way to say cranky and bitchy?"

[tastes-of-honey.livejournal.com]

Depends on what direction and velocity you're using.

[killwithmymind.livejournal.com]

"And whether or not there's a coconut?" Geek powers activate!

[tastes-of-honey.livejournal.com]

You're so cute.

[killwithmymind.livejournal.com]

That makes Nagi scowl, which is also sort of cute. "I'd really prefer to be dangerously sexy."

...no, really. If he has to hear one more of the Takatori brat's business connections comment on how damn young he looks....

[tastes-of-honey.livejournal.com]

I know, but you won't be young forever so you should take advantage of the perks while you can.

[killwithmymind.livejournal.com]

"Remind me what the perks are?"

[tastes-of-honey.livejournal.com]

Being underestimated. Having more of your life ahead of you. Healing faster. Those kinds of things.

[killwithmymind.livejournal.com]

"Even if I finally look like my alts do, I'm still gonna be underestimated. I mean, who's gonna beleive that I can crush them with my mind?" Nagi's still too young to be thinking about being old in any sort of real way.

[tastes-of-honey.livejournal.com]

Since it won't matter how old you are, suck it up. There are unfair aspects to all of our abilities.

[killwithmymind.livejournal.com]

"But looking older will get me more chicks." And probably more guys. Hell, looking this young is AWKWARD when you work in a porn studio.

[tastes-of-honey.livejournal.com]

True and true. But are you really telling me that you can't find people who want to be topped by someone who looks like a cute, pretty kid?

[killwithmymind.livejournal.com]

"While avoiding the really gross perverts? It's harder than you might think." Being a telepath really makes Nagi even more picky about his partners than he could be.

[tastes-of-honey.livejournal.com]

Your point. I have so much perversion flying across my brain on a daily basis that I have a high tolerance at times.

But you're gonna get older.

[killwithmymind.livejournal.com]

Pout! "But am I ever gonna look older? I know I'm over 18." There were some shops that Nagi literally couldn't enter before that he visits now.

[tastes-of-honey.livejournal.com]

I doubt you'll still look 12 if you die at the age of 60.

[killwithmymind.livejournal.com]

He wrinkles his nose. "That would be super freaky."

"...did we solve your problem, by the way? I got all distracted."

[tastes-of-honey.livejournal.com]

Kind of. I've decided to keep my flat while giving Brad an open-ended trial living-together.

I was wondering how we'd started talking about my problem and flipped over totally to yours. ::smirk::

[killwithmymind.livejournal.com]

"Oh, that's easy. You're not supposed to have problems so that the world can revolve around me and my drama. Usually, I'm better at sorting your out before we get to the important stuff." Bratty Nagi is bratty.

[tastes-of-honey.livejournal.com]

::No kidding.::

I'll have to keep that in mind, go to you quickly and make you to fix my problems so the world can revolve around you again.

[killwithmymind.livejournal.com]

"Damn straight." Nagi frowns in an odd mixture of confusion and disapproval. "I don't like it when you're unhappy."

[tastes-of-honey.livejournal.com]

::Confusion and disapproval are Schu's weapons!:: Good. The whole world should feel the same way.

[killwithmymind.livejournal.com]

Under the confusion, Nagi has decidedly schmoopy feelings towards his Schu-mom. Of course, the confusion is over why he cares so much since there are supposed to be afterglow feelings. "Yeah. That's right."

"...should we go have sex now?"

[tastes-of-honey.livejournal.com]

::Poor Nagin. It makes Schu happy, though.:: We could if you want to.

[killwithmymind.livejournal.com]

"Have I ever told you I don't want sex?" Nagi sidles into Schu's personal space.

[tastes-of-honey.livejournal.com]

::hug:: There might come a time. I'm just being considerate.

[killwithmymind.livejournal.com]

"I could be too tired or something, I guess, but I'd still want you." Nagi cops a feel as he returns the hug. It's not his fault he's so short!

[tastes-of-honey.livejournal.com]

You flatter me. ::kiss::

[killwithmymind.livejournal.com]

Nagi returns the kiss, twining his fingers in Schu's hair to keep him close. "Your place or mine?"

[tastes-of-honey.livejournal.com]

Mmmm. Yours. I haven't moved into a new place with Brad yet and I'm playing hard to get with Aya.

[killwithmymind.livejournal.com]

"Mmm." Nagi thinks it could be amusing if Aya showed up after Nagi had worn him out, but he's not going to quibble.

PINpoint away!

[tastes-of-honey.livejournal.com]

::Aya would be utterly unsurprised.::

::PINpoint away!::