Guilty Pleasures

Brad's pissed. Somebody hacked into his stocks, investing him in things like Prozac and companies that specialize in relationship counseling. When he asked me if I knew who was doing this, I could say I didn't. Because I can guess, but I don't know. *cough*killwithmymind*cough*

How sweet that somebody is not just making him feel vulnerable by hacking his stock portfolio but also trying to send him a message in the process.

So Brad's pissed. Again. Still. And I'm still not spending much time in the apartment. At least he's starting to feel a little bad about that without then getting resentful that I'm making him feel bad blah de blah.

I dunno. He's being a moron but I'm still on the fence about whether I should stay or go. I hate when I get this indecisive.

The sandpaper feeling has come back since Brad's pissed over the whole Nexus Nagi thing. He was being a total passive-aggressive ass about it and how jealous and worried he felt until I finally prodded it into the open. A major shouting match ensued and might have headed into another physical fight if my Nagi hadn't done a little telepathic "Hi there." Brad told Nagi he could yell at me once he was done, but Nagi wasn't having it. He was in front of our building now so he would see me now. Since Nagi didn't sound pissed anymore, I waved at Brad and dashed out, figuring I could resume getting growled at later.

Nagi had come to drag me off to dinner, not that I need dragging where food's concerned. killwithmymind's hacking into his account and donation of the money to NAMBLA and some goat fucker organization had just amused him and further shown that I hadn't had anything to do with the Mother's Day note. Though my Nagi told me to tell the other Nagi that if the hacking continued there would be war. "What am I, a telephone?" I asked. I told him that killwithmymind was scoring big time in the Nexus, which made him smirk.

Over an excellent meal, all at Nagi's deep-pocketed expense, we talked. Kid told me that he and Omi had been kaput for a while, with things going bad after the dissolution of his Weiβ squad. Omi didn't recover. I told Nagi that he had the looks and wealth to get anyone he wanted, but he just sighed.

I realized that my baby was depressed and lonely, feeling isolated in the organization he led, something he hadn't fully realized himself until he started talking to me over dinner. His usual "quiet, still, deep water" feeling felt darker, deeper now. Subtext: He'd realized that he missed me. A little.

He asked me if Brad often got like "that," and I caught a memory flash from him of getting hit in the face by Brad over that whole Töt thing. He didn't ask if I got hit often but implied it. I answered that Brad losing his shit with me had become more common lately, especially about my socializing in the Nexus. Nagi couldn't get why Brad didn't see the benefits of being able to 'port around, and I responded that he did see them but hated me actually talking to people along the way, especially people who were versions of folks from our past. (I can't use a Portal to get into Nagi's office. It's blocked off. I don't know if the fabric of reality is coincidentally thicker there or if he uses telekinesis more there and that affects it or what. It's not too out of the ordinary because Portals can't take you literally anywhere.)

He offered me a place in his organization, offering me more interesting jobs than the bodyguarding thing I currently had going. He liked my success rate, appreciated my power and training, and saw a lot of benefits in my use of Portals. "What about Brad?" I asked. Nagi answered that Brad would never consent to be ordered around by someone he once commanded. If Brad did agree to it, he would only do it out of the ambition of eventually taking the top spot himself. All true. I launched into a defense of Brad's good qualities, but Nagi just gave me a kind of pitying look until I cast my chopsticks down and stood up to leave. No one condescends to me.

He stood and apologized, saying he hadn't meant to offend me, but could I please consider his offer? I could do that. I sat down and we resumed eating, quietly making polite meaningless conversation now and then. Nagi had never been loquacious, and when I was just about alone with him I didn't blabber as much either.

Finally he took me to his apartment, which I hadn't seen for myself before. Big, expensive penthouse suite done in an austere, minimalist style. It could have been in a magazine. I hated it. There was nothing human in there, nothing to make you comfortable, no personality. Closest thing to "personal" was the computer setup. The thought of my baby living alone in such a cold, hard place, a void, left a bad taste in my mouth. I swore to get the kid a stuffed animal for it or something.

Nagi led me to the couch and settled into my arms, leaning into me. He rarely asked to be touched, so when he did you paid special attention. I hugged him and stroked his hair, and together we said nothing. Eventually his grip on me tightened and he started to nuzzle my neck right where he knows I like it, and I let him do what he wanted with me. It's a good thing I don't often have sex with telekinetics because the right one can ruin you for mundane lovers. You never wanna go back. Of course, you want to have one of the trained telekinetics as a lover, because one who can’t control himself, especially during orgasm, is not a good idea. This public service announcement brought to you by Schuldigs for Better Psychic Sex.

We dozed together for a while afterwards, then I went back to Brad, who was, of course, even more pissed off than before and could add Nagi trying to steal me away to his list of rage. Being pissed off myself--and stupid--I said that at least with him I wouldn't get screamed at so often and that Nagi was a more considerate lover. Oh yeah. Dumb. We broke a few lamps before Brad got this epiphany moment or some such and asked when we'd turned into a white trash couple. Then he went to his bedroom and locked the door, being even mentally quiet. I went to my own and smoked and stared at nothing for a while.